


England's Private Moments

by Fall_in_Fyrearth



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-07
Updated: 2013-10-08
Packaged: 2017-12-28 18:26:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/995098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fall_in_Fyrearth/pseuds/Fall_in_Fyrearth
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"So what you're saying is that with this machine we can technically spy on any nation and see what they're doing without them knowing it?" I questioned staring at Japan. He nodded his head slowly. A Fall in Snow Work</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. England and the Pegasus

Hello! I'll write these as I get inspiration for them so they may be slower or faster depending on how much time I spend in Lala land. There is an oc that will appear simi-frequently but I'll try to keep some other nations in it. And don't worry Iggy isn't paired with the oc they've just known each other forever.

Thanks to Fyrearth for being my beta reader!

France P.O.V.

"So what you're saying is that with this machine we can technically spy on any nation and see what they're doing without them knowing it?" I questioned staring at Japan. He nodded his head slowly.

"Yes, we were attempting to create a time machine, but after many, many months of testing we were not able to go back in time but to see the present time."

"We should so totally try it out!" America shouted like an overzealous puppy.

"We should not!" Japan exclaimed in a very out of character manner for him. "I only brought the machine to inform the nations of the world that I had it and to assure you we were not using it to spy."

"Honhonhon. This is a perfect test opportunity for you Kiku." I spoke letting a smile grace my perfectly flawless lips. "We can see what mon cher Angleterre is doing." I winked over Japan's head at Gilbert known to many as Prussia.

"No we should not use the machine!" Japan stayed in his overly loud state. It was very amusing to see him so flustered.

"No, no I think it was this button, mi amigo." Spain spoke from beside Prussia. He reached out a hand as he spoke and pushed a button. The machine made a whirling of noises before the room around us blurred out of focus. In the instant it took for me to feel motion sickness the setting around us had changed. No longer were we standing in the office conference room, but at green and dreary surroundings.

We were in England and it was raining, "yet we feel no rain." I hadn't realized I had spoken aloud until Japan responded to me.

"That is because we are still physically in the conference room. We can't change anything in our visible surroundings since we are not actually here."

"Hey, dude! There's Iggy!" America shouted from somewhere beside us.

I looked to him and then where he was pointing.

There sitting on a crumbling stone wall was mon cher Angleterre. The rain dripped down his features making his untamable mop of blond almost a brunette and glued it to the sides of his face. Black slacks made themselves at home on his shapely legs but were neither jeans nor his normal bland dress pants. The button up shirt he had on was cream with a grey vest that was unbuttoned. Altogether it was an image of England not normally seen and I had never seen those pants on him before. They do not look like something he would have picked on his own.

He was soaked all the way through as though he had been here for a while. His back was towards us facing deep emerald woods.

I took a glance around. Behind us there were woods as well. The stone wall had long stripes of treeless high grass running parallel to it. It looked like one of America's roadways yet instead of a road it was a wall.

"I come see you and you take me to play in the rain." A cheery very female voice spoke up. A girl came into view through a dip in where the wall had crumbled away. She was blonde but with the rain it had turned a shade similar to Arthur's; she wore it in a simple pony tail her bangs sweeping across her forehead and tucked behind her ear giving her a tomboyish feel despite its length. She wore a smirk on her face but much like Arthur her most fetching features were her eyes.

To sound cliché they looked like the sea. At first glance they were a blue tinted with green, but the longer I looked the more I could see the grey of a stormy Atlantic. Yet the blue would over power again making me remember the crisp clear waters of the Caribbean. The green fought back making harbors dance behind my eyes. Besides me Alfred gasped in awe-even the American could appreciate the beauty of those eyes.

"Damn! Arthur's got himself a girl, and he's been holding out on us! Not awesome." Gilbert exclaimed from somewhere behind me. I did have to agree with him; mon petit lapin having a girlfriend and not mentioning her was rather strange. He was always trying to imitate me and those exquisite sea eyes would be worth bragging about. Maybe she was a recent thing, but the way she pulled herself onto the wall and interacted with Arthur spoke that they knew each other fairly well.

I wonder how fair our dear "gentleman" has been with her. This experience was becoming more beneficial to me by the moment. I had many new things too tease Arthur with now.

With the girl on the wall, I could get a better view of her than just her pretty face. She was taller than mon lapin by a couple of inches. It appeared she was wearing a similar material to Arthur's pants since the wet pants didn't seem to annoy her. They were dark in color and she wore a deep blue jacket that hugged her shapely form but didn't appear to be too thick of a material. Overall she was a nice catch for Arthur.

Which made me wonder why he was keeping her a secret; she was nothing to be ashamed of.

"I have yet to let you down, Amelia; I don't plan on starting anytime soon." Arthur's voice replied cheerfully to her. He had turned his head and was facing her now. The rest of him in the same position as when we arrived

"Not the way I see it mister." She pointed at him revealing a long slender digit to the rest of us. Her nails were cut short and painted a deep navy blue. An interesting choice of girl for mon lapin. "I'm the one who never let you down." She smirked at him and cocked a delicately shaped eyebrow with a "what now" face.

A pretty girl with some spunk she may just be what Arthur needs to liven up.

"You didn't even give me the decency of dying at sea."

What? What was this girl talking about? Arthur dying at sea and she wanted him to!

"That's one messed up girlfriend Arthur has there." Alfred mused beside me.

I nodded my agreement. No wonder Arthur doesn't talk about her; she's crazy! Of course there would have to be something wrong with her to go for someone with Arthur's personality. That is as long as he treats his dates like the rest of us.

"I'm the one at fault, am I?" Arthur retorted with a snort. "If I recall correctly, you were the one who faked your own death in order to get off of my ship." He smirked back at her with a "so there" look.

I feel like I've stumbled on to a bad daytime TV soap opera. One of those horribly addictive shows with bad acting and plots, yet for some reason you just keep watching.

"Oh get off it." She smirked back at him again, yet there was no malice in their banter. They sounded like old friends having a playful argument that they had had one too many times. "You know I was the best first mate you ever had and there was no way you were letting me stay at port and not go with you."

I thought Arthur had stopped sailing after his pirating days and once it really wasn't all convenient for travel.

"Not without a valid excuse." Arthur interrupted her. "I seen no reason you would want to leave and I couldn't risk Spain having a first mate like you."

Ever the bitter rivalry between those two it would be rather nice if they could just get along.

"Awww! England that's so sweet!" she grabbed a hold of him in a hug smashing his face into her breast.

Honhonhon so Arthur has been getting some.

"I think that's one of the nicest things you said to me!" she proceeded to rock back and forth squishing Arthur's face farther into her ample chest.

I do believe I would rather like to try out Angleterre's place.

"Did she just call him England and refer to me as Spain" Antonio spoke up from besides me. "Who is this girl that Inglaterra would risk so much?"

It was a taboo to tell humans other than our bosses of our existence. Wars had been fought over these types of things before.

"Maybe she's a nation." Alfred spoke up from beside me. "I mean have you listened to how her and Iggy talk? It's like she was there when he himself sailed ships across the Atlantic." I was slightly in shock from America's intelligent response. I often time forgot that his overly cheerful and carefree nature masks his observation skills and intelligence.

"Non, she is not a nation or we would sense it, but she is most peculiar no? Especially the way she handles Angleterre." I smiled as Alfred gave me a dumb look. Gilbert cackled like crazy still somewhere behind me and Antonio gave a laugh.

"Damn, I'd trade places with him right now." I could feel his grin that accompanied his laughter. Arthur had since detangled himself from the girl and was leaning away from her, a playful glare on his face. A playful glare, only Angleterre could pull that look off. But then when one spends most of their time with a particular look on their face they become the master of it.

"I though the idea was to have me die at sea, not suffocate me to death on land." He gave her a wiry look.

She was nicely endowed. I would have thought Arthur may have found it a most pleasurable way to go.

"Oh come on you know it would be an epic way to go! France would be jealous." She taunted back.

Does la fille know me?

Mon lapin gave her a dead panned look and she held his gaze with a haughty smirk. The edges of Arthur's mouth began to twitch upwards as he suppressed a laugh. She smiled widely at him showing off her pearly white teeth. Arthur let a full smile cross his face before laughter escaped out of him. He doubled over clenching his sides with the amount of laughter. It had been a long time since I had seen mon lapin laugh in a non-manic way. I felt my gaze soften at the ability to relax this girl was giving Arthur. Perhaps I wouldn't tease him about it.

"That," he choked out. "I would pay to see." I'm glad he takes such amusement in my pain. His laughter started to die down but the mirth was still there, "the frog being smothered to death by his latest catches bosom." The girl burst into laughter as well renewing Arthur's laughter. "Amelia you will be the death of me." He stated wiping tears from the corners of his eyes.

I am not that bad!

"If a former colony or your brothers don't beat me to it," she grinned at him cheekily. "I'll happily be your murderer as long as it's at sea." At least I can get a girl who isn't obsessed with my death.

"What's with this girl and her not awesome obsession with killing England at sea?" Gilbert spoke up finally making his way besides me.

"To be slain by Davy Jones herself," Arthur struck a stereotypical poet pose as well as he could while sitting on the wall. "What ex-pirate wouldn't dream of that?" He smirked at her.

She's Davy Jones! It must be some kind of role playing game they play. It just can't be true. I doubted Arthur would be into kinky games, yet he surprises me quite often.

"Most of them," The girl dead panned looking at Arthur all of her laughter gone, "Considering most of them think me to be a man and now, thanks to fucking America's movie, they think I have an octopus head…" she turned glaring off into the distance.

Did this girl really believe she was Davy Jones? She is as crazy as Arthur.

"Come now it's not all that bad." Arthur tried to console her. "It renewed interest in the legends and that's always a good thing for magical creatures."

I can't believe he believes this craziness.

She still didn't turn to face him. "Look at how they portray the English in their movies with that shitty overly exaggerated accent." She turned to him a hint of a grin on her face.

"The accent is pretty bad. And the pirate movies weren't all bad; I watched them all."

"Oh get off it! You just liked Orlando Bloom in them. It's the same reason you watch Lord of the Rings." He huffed turning away from her.

"Not true! I watch the pirate movies for Captain Jack Sparrow, because as horrible as it is, he reminds me of you when you had more freedom." Arthur made a motion to interject but she cut him off. "Oh come on you can't tell me some of the shit we pulled was logical-most of it was just bat shit insane."

He grinned at her at this. But then what is she? She talks like she was there and nothing other than nations should live so long.

"And I watch the Lord of the Rings because you're absolutely hilarious to watch those movies with. One minute you're impressed-don't give me that look-and the next you're going off on how horrible they are." Arthur looked away from her grumbling but with a smile on his face.

I didn't think Angleterre watched movies besides the ones Alfred forces him to watch with him.

"Shh," Arthur moved suddenly outstretching one of his hands towards Amelia. "Hand me one of the apples."

Armed with the red fruit Arthur slid of the wall and into the waist high grasses around the wall. He moved in a slow crouch towards the woods he had had his body facing. Halfway to the woods he slid his hand with the fruit in it out in front of him, but continued his slow movements making him look rather awkward.

Gilbert cackled besides me. "Look he's going to play with more of his imaginary friends!" He continued his laughter.

Arthur had by now made it to the edge of the woods the fruit still held out in the flat of his palm. Something white moved in the shadows of the trees. Slowly a horse head emerged from the woods sniffing at the offered apple. The horse slowly moved into view. It was a virgin white mare, yet this was not the most striking feature she possessed but the white wings that graced her flanks.

"Is that a Pegasus?" America gasped almost breathless besides me.

"It is beautiful." Japan whispered beside me. I had to still myself from jumping; I had forgot he was here.

"Who knew old crabby England had something so awesome in his borders?" Gilbert chipped in.

"Maybe he's telling the truth about the unicorns as well." Antonio chirped.

The Pegasus sniffed the offered apple before moving forward to sniff at Angleterre's hair. Seeming to accept Arthur as not a threat she turned back to the apple and ate it straight from his hand. The girl who Arthur had brought with him had sat up at attention staring in awe at the creature before her. Arthur put his hand that hadn't been holding the apple into the air and made a 'come hither' motion at her. She leaned forward before sliding off the wall and moving at a much slower pace than Arthur had towards the creature.

After sniffing Arthur's hand once again the Pegasus decided he didn't have any more food and moved back to sniffing his hair. Seemingly satisfied that Arthur was who it thought he was, the Pegasus began rubbing its head against Arthur's messing up his plastered down hair even more. Arthur's hands came up hugging the creature round its neck, nuzzling his check with it's.

"Hullo, Stella. How have you been?" he questioned the creature while continuing to pet it.

The Pegasus now known as Stella lifted her head from the nuzzling of Arthur, freezing at the sight of Amelia. Amelia had approached slowly and now stopped a few feet away hand outstretch with the apple and crouched down low. Too bad for the tall grass or it would have been a nice view of her backside; somehow Angleterre is always finding a way to foil my plans at amor.

"She's alright my sweet." Arthur cooed at the creature. "She's a very dear friend of mine." The creature snorted. "As are you and I thought my two girls should meet." The Pegasus almost seemed to nod before moving slowly, tentatively towards Amelia. Arthur leaned back on the balls of his feet watching the two of them start to interact.

Stella sniffed Amelia much like she had done Arthur, but instead of eating out of her hand, Stella picked the apple up and moved it to finish eating. The apple gone it appeared as if a tentative bridge had been made between the two and Stella began to sniff Amelia again.

I looked back over for mon petit lapin but he had disappeared.

Stella began rubbing her head against Amelia causing the girl to laugh.

"Does he take all the girls to meet you, Sweetheart?" Amelia questioned as she ran her hand down the creature's nose. "Or am I special?" Amelia looked up to where Arthur had been as if she expected a response. "Arthur?" the Pegasus looked up to where the nation had been. Stella moved exposing the little entrance Arthur had crouched in when he had beckoned her out. Arthur's laughter rang out through the air.

Sitting in the mud, leaning back, braced on his hands was Arthur. This was twice I had heard Arthur laugh in a manner I hadn't heard since he was a child. Twice in one day and all without the presence of another nation.

Why couldn't any of us get that laugh out of Arthur?

Jumping around him in the mud was two smaller Pegasi. One with a tint of blue to it the other pink, how very cliché of the colors. I bet they're a boy and girl.

"I didn't know you had little ones, Stella." Arthur laughed rubbing both sides of the blue ones head as the pink one nuzzled into his side. They jumped away and around him acting like big winged puppies. "Mind if I name them my dear?" The Pegasus shook her head at him. So it did understand what he was saying and it was responding.

This is becoming weirder by the second. I'll have to confirm with Gilbert and Antonio that this actually happened.

"Hmmm… you shall be Ion," Arthur spoke tapping the blue one on the nose with his fingers. "If you may little dear one… hmmm you're not an Iona…no, no, no, no, that won't do for a set of twins as wonderful as you. Always questioning who was named after whom. How about Ilyana?"

The pink one jumped away from him and rubbing her cheek against his before making her escape.

"Ion and Ilyana, Ilyana and Ion it goes either way rather nicely." He stood from the ground attempting to wipe the mud from his pants. "We best be on our way Amelia. I didn't know there was little ones and their father might have tolerated a stranger before, but with them I'm sure he will not now."

As the words left Arthur's lips the whirling returned. The motion sick vision that accompanied it before made itself known as we all found ourselves in the conference room.

"Aww I wanted to see more." Alfred whined.

"Si I was hoping to see a unicorn." Antonio joined in.

"Why are we back?" I questioned Kiku.

"It appears that the machines batteries have run too low for it to function." Kiku spoke up sounding relieved. "We must not speak of the incident to England or he will be very upset."

"Fine, fine," Gilbert gave a wave of his hand. "I wanna see what other awesome creatures England's been hiding from us. When will the machine be operational again?"

"No, no, no!" Kiku cried out.

"So what do we all think of this Amelia, Arthur has?" I questioned rather curious as to the others opinions.

"I don't generally believe in this stuff, but we've just seen a Pegasus. Maybe we can give them the benefit of the doubt." America spoke in a solemn voice. It seems the boy had put quite a lot of thought into it. There were similar courses from Antonio and Gilbert. I nodded before turning away.

This will be fun. I got to see a side of mon petit lapin I haven't seen in millennia and to see his cute maybe girlfriend. I can't wait to tease him about it.


	2. England Can Cook

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This slipped my mind last time, but I do not own Hetalia or Davy Jones or the band Train. Amelia is mine though.
> 
> Thanks to my beta Fyrearth! What I'd do without you I have no idea. And I've started to figure this out...

Gilbert's P.O.V.

The awesomeness that is me has been coming to these meeting for years. Mostly to mess with my little brother, West, but sometimes I come to see how my fellow not-quite-as-awesome as me nations were holding up. I felt that, with my nation gone, it was somehow my job to make sure none of the nations I had fought with and against lost theirs. I'm not being sentimental. That would be un-awesome. Yet seeing how the nations that had once ruled the world had changed made me feel…. It would be un-awesome if any of them fell. Then I would just be history, none of my awesomeness known by any of the younger nations.

Speaking of younger nations, I snorted looking at America; who would have thought such a schwachkopf could bring the cold and cruel sailor of the seven seas to his knees. Cold and cruel… not so much anymore; Arthur wasn't someone I worried about often. Come on, you mess with him and America's all over you. Yet he's the best example. He's mellowed a lot—shit that would have gotten you shot or strung up from a ceiling fan by your toes just gets an angry retort now a days. The only one he's physical with is France and they never hurt each other all that badly anymore.

I remember a time when his glare could give a man a heart attack outta fear. He still has a wicked glare, but nothing like his pirate days. Damn, now I sound old and sentimental, not awesome! Not awesome at all. I wasn't worried about my drink partner, not at all. Sure he couldn't hold his liquor, but once he started to cry, just give him some more rum and he turned into a riot! Sometimes laughable sometimes physically abusive… it really depended on the day, and if Francis was there, or if we were in France.

Japan walked into the room, and America bounded to his side like one of West's dogs. The kid was being rather un-awesome today. He had his days were he almost rivaled me in awesomeness, but today wasn't one of them.

"Did you bring it? Didja? Huh huh huh!" America bounced around Japan. Kiku's jaw clenched slightly before it smoothed away in a mask of no emotion. I wonder if I could wind Kiku up and watch him explode. It would almost be as funny as seeing West go off over coffee grinds in his coffee pot!

"Hai, Alfred-san I brought it. Although I must once again try and persuade you not to use it." Kiku sighed looking at America imploringly. America ignored him or didn't notice at all taking the bird cage shaped item out of Japan's hands.

"No way! That Pegasus was super cool! Iggy never shows any of us anything like that!" America laughed setting the machine on the table. The meeting room door opened.

"Hola! Francis won't be able to come today. His boss wants him for something." Antonio walked into the room sliding his cell phone into his pocket as he did so.

"Okay let get this awesome show on the road." I moved towards the machine.

"I will set the machine up Prussia-san." Japan stepped between me and the machine and, before I could tell him how un-awesome he was being, the world blurred and the whirling began.

England's living room came into view. The cute chick from before—Amelia—was sitting on Arthur's un-awesome flower print couch. She was a girl after my own heart. The girl was angled on the couch so her legs were flipped over the back resting on the green throw cover across the back. Her head was barely on the seat cushion with her blonde hair draped onto the floor. One arm was thrown over her stomach and the other over her eyes.

"Hahahah," America's voice filtered in. "her socks don't match!"

Arthur needs to take that boy to a strip club and give him the talk. Her socks are what he notices. She was wearing one of those American shirts… what are they called…. Baby tee's! Basically it was a tiny tee shirt that hugged her every curve and if she moved just slightly showed a little skin between the edge of her shirt and pants. The shirt was black with a Canadian flag resting perfectly on her breast. Studded black leather belt held up boot cut jeans covering her slim legs, and as America had pointed out one highlighter green sock covered one foot while the other was hidden behind black and white stripes. I could feel the aggravations the mismatched socks would cause West. I'd have to try it.

"Arthur!" she called out without moving. "Arthur, Artie, Iggy, England, Angleterre!" she called out not moving. While she had been calling, Arthur had stomped down the stairs. I have very high suspicions she had heard him coming down. My theory was further proved by the smirk on her face which she tried to hide with an arm. She's so awesome; not as awesome as me but pretty high up there.

"What!" he all but shouted at her and before she could continue, "and stop with speaking in the fucking frog's language! And you know I don't like those nicknames!" she moved during his tirade rolling over so she was on her knees in front of him her hands resting on the arm rest. On the back of her little shirt in block letters that matched the red of the flag were the words 'I know that you want to be Canadian.' I can say she was making it a tempting offer.

"Captain Kirkland," she began her butt wiggling in the air. Damn first chance I get I'm stealing her from him. Arthur's way too boring for her. She put on a pouting face but her awesome oceanic eyes held a smirk. "I'm hungry." She stated. "Feed me?" She gave him an attempt at a puppy dog face but was failing because of the smile threatening her lips.

Arthur rubbed his hands on his face. "I give up!" he threw his hands into the air adding more of his weight on one of his legs. That's totally a girl pose, "I'll make something." He turned showing off his un-tucked white button up shirt and washed out skinny black jeans. I haven't seen those pants since his punk days. Who knew grumpy Arthur still wore them. Next time we go drinking I'm making him wear those awesome pants.

"He's gonna kill her!" America gasped in horror. "We have to save her!"

"We are not actually here, so there is nothing we can do without stopping the machine." Kiku spoke up. I do believe I detected a hint of smugness in his voice, but I knew it was hopeless to see his face he would already have it back in an emotionless mask.

"Maybe after she tastes his cooking she will break up with him." Antonio spoke up. He was off to my left. He had his hands clasped behind his back and was swinging them slightly. Some days I don't know if he's acting innocent or actually is aware of what he's doing.

"And none of the shit you pull on France and the rest of the world." Amelia shouted from the couch. "I know you can cook, and you know I know it." She finished with her pointer finger up in the air, hand appearing over the back of the couch. She made a circle motion with her wrist as if to emphasis what she meant before letting it fall back over her face.

"Whatever." Arthur leaned back into the room around a corner. "Hope you don't want anything too specific. I still need to make it out to the market." He continued to watch her. Maybe he was going to offer her something to do. Isn't that good hosting skill or some bullshit like that?

"Nope, go for it!" the girl chirped. She fished around before grabbing the remote control and turning the TV on.

"I see you Joanna," filtered from the speakers.

"Sweeny Todd's on!" the girl squealed. "That guy's suck a creeper!" She moved so she was sitting on the couch, feet on the coffee table. Her eyes lit up in happiness… and maybe a little malice was in there too…

"Glad you're amused," Arthur dead panned at her before going back into the kitchen. He bent over looking into the fridge. There was a clink sound and he slid out holding a green bell pepper, carrots, and half of an onion. "Hmmm, I need to go shopping." He moved over to a cabinet above the counter besides the stove. There were different spices on the shelves.

He began moving some around looking at what he had in the cabinet. "Damn, what can I make…" he trailed off pulling some liquids out of the cabinet. "Hmmm, I've got Mirin and soy sauce… this is going to be a weird stir fry." He set the bottles beside the stove before going back to the fridge. He reappeared with some beef in his hands. "It's not the right cut but it'll have to do." He sighed rummaging in another cabinet pulling out a cutting board and a metal bowl. He pulled a butcher knife from a block on the counter.

At this point I was truly going to have to start fearing for this girl's life. How is she supposed to date the awesomeness that is me when she's in a coma from food poisoning? Davy Jones or not I'm positive Arthur's cooking is the most hazardous substance out there.

Arthur un-wrapped the meat and placed it on the cutting board. He started humming a little tune to himself as he picked up the butcher knife. He held the edge of the blade to the light, looking down both side. With a nod of his head I assumed he had deemed it acceptable. A manic grin spread across his face as he turned to the meat and I swear his eyes changed color! One moment they're green… like emerald green to be girly about it, and the next they're that eerie green you see in the crappy American movies when something radiates energy or is radioactive. Damn that was freaky!

He placed the knife, with a skilled hand, a few centimeters into the meat before cutting a slice down. He proceeded to cut that strip into similarly sized squares, and toss them into the bowl. I'm not all that surprised Arthur can handle a knife. Come on, he was a fricking pirate; he would have handled knives. He went on to finish his chunk of meat in the same fashion but his cheerful humming had gained lyrics.

"I've been high, I've been low." His light singing turned into a small dance number as he started swaying slightly with the rhythm of the song. "I've been yes, and I've been oh hell oh no!" He moved the knife away waving it for a moment while bobbing his head. "I've been rock'n roll, and disco." He went back to finishing the meat. "Won't you save me San Francisco?"

"Hey, hey, hey that's my city! Hahahah! Iggy's not going to live this one down." America crowed.

Arthur paused after finished the last line. "Damn, if Alfred heard me now I'd never hear the end of it." If only he knew we were watching him now, that's rather creepy. He snorted stabbing at the meat viciously for a second. "Amelia!" He shouted as he finished the meat.

"What?" Amelia called back. "We're killing people."

"Yes, yes, you've seen this movie several times before." Arthur dropped the board and knife into the sink turning on the hot water. He pulled out a measuring spoon. Measuring out first the Mirin and dropping it into the bowl then two spoonful's of soy sauce.

"And your point is…"Amelia trailed off still not moving from the couch or taking her eyes from the TV.

"You're not allowed to bring new music when you have recently been in the States." He went back to the sink, putting some soap on the sponge and cleaning the knife and board before bring them back to the counter.

"Awwww," Amelia whined. "Which one did I get stuck in your head?"

"The one about San Francisco saving me," Arthur replied pulling a frying pan out onto the stove. He poured a smidgeon of oil in the pan and turned it on. Maybe this girl will get the hint when she smells smoke. With a spin and another impressive display of his skills with a knife Arthur minced the onion and had in a professional cook movement slid the freshly minced onion into the sizzling oil. Armed with a wooden spoon he gave the onions a quick stir before quickly returning to the bell pepper. The pepper was quickly turned into little chunks and Arthur was back at the onions with his spoon.

"It's by Train." Amelia chirped appearing over the counter. "That smells really good." She said sniffing the air.

"It should, all I've done is sauté onions." He stirred them one more time, the onions starting to take on a transparent look. While looking at the onions he picked up the bowl of meat and sauces, and proceeded to pour them into the skillet. Arthur let it set for a few seconds cooking the side that came into contact with the pan. I took a step back from the situation. Well, mentally not physically. Arthur is infamous for the charcoal he serves as food, yet I'm not seeing where he goes wrong. Does he cook it too long?

"Were you going to do something with the carrots?"

"Carrots?" Arthur questioned going silent for a moment. "Shoot," he turned back to the carrots setting them on the board and cutting them into small disks. He spun back to the meat giving it another stir before adding another spoonful of mirin and two more of soy sauce directly to the pan.

"Good thing I'm here to save your ass, aye Captain?" Amelia gave him a shit eating grin. Arthur snorted at her but didn't grace her with a reply. Once all the sides of the meat were brown Arthur added the carrots letting them simmer some. A few more stirs and the bell peppers were added.

"There's some left over white rice in the fridge if you wouldn't mind warming it up." Arthur addressed Amelia scratching the edge of his nose with a finger.

"Something wrong?" Amelia asked popping the rice into the microwave. She leaned back against the edge of the counter top.

"I can't shake the feeling that someone's coming." Arthur said giving the mixture another stir. Amelia made a humming sound at him in acknowledgement. "But we wouldn't have stayed in London if I thought that was possible." He continued absent-mindedly stirring the concoction. "Alfred and Francis were in a meeting, and they're the only ones who truly drop in completely without warning."

Arthur pulled the mixture off the burner turning it off. The microwave beeped and Amelia now held a steaming bowl of warmed up rice. Arthur's head shot up his eyes going as wide as saucers. Thankfully, since he had put down the knife his eye color had gone back to normal.

"Shit! Move into the closet!" Arthur shouted. Pan in hand, he started corralling Amelia, who was holding the rice still, towards the closet in the living room.

"What!" Amelia tried to turn and look at him only to keep getting pushed.

"I'm not sure who it is but someone is coming!" he pulled open the door to the closet giving Amelia one last push. He shoved the skillet into her hands before shutting the door. In a flurry of movement he ran back to the kitchen and turned the stove onto broil. He dug into a cabinet pulling out a burnt cookie sheet.

No, there was no way he was doing what I think he might be doing. That would be just cruel.

Arthur made a grab for the cookie jar on the counter before dumping the contents on the cookie sheet. Black lumps and crumbs scattered across the sheet, Arthur's infamous scones in the flesh.

He shoved the cookie sheet into the oven, before once again getting into a cabinet. He pulled down a bag of flour before he started to festively throw it in the air. He tossed a few handfuls on to the stove and counter before pouring a good portion on the ground.

"Shit, shit, shit, shit" Arthur chanted as he ran towards a bathroom while undoing his belt. He disappeared into the bathroom only to reappear seconds later in his old man pants, sweater vest draped over his arm as he frantically did his tie. Arthur ran back to the living room. A burning smell had started to perforate the room. He pulled the sweater vest over his head and flopped in his chair as the front door flew open.

"Bonjour mon petit lapin!" Francis called coming through Arthur's front door. In true Arthur fashion, Arthur was quick on the draw. There wasn't any hint that he had just put on this show and hadn't been there all day being boring. I wonder if Francis remembered we were using the machine today.

"Who gave you permission to just let yourself into my house?" Arthur screamed at him. "Get out and go back to your own slimy country you blasted frog!"

"Oh, L'Angleterre mon amour, nothing could keep us apart." Francis swept his arms open wide and made a movement towards Arthur as if to hug him. He halted in his movement and took a sniff of the air. "Is something burning Angleterre?" He cocked his head slightly to the side.

"My scones!" Arthur cried out like he was worried, hands up in the air and everything. What a faker! He ran towards the kitchen with Francis hot on his heels. Arthur pulled open the door on his oven pulling out the cookie sheet and scones. Francis leaned over him turning the stove till it clicked without looking at it. Arthur set the tray on top of the stove and turned to face a corner of the kitchen, facing away from Francis, with his shoulders hunched.

"Mon lapin?" Francis moved his hand slightly to touch Arthur's shoulders.

"Don't touch me, frog." Arthur sniffed rather pathetically, half-heartedly moving his shoulders out of Francis' grasp.

"What were you trying to do, Arthur?" Francis question softly almost like he was afraid of hurting the little backstabber.

"I was making scones." Arthur moved towards the pan. "They're fine, right?" He turned to Francis, eyes imploringly huge and slightly teary. "You'll eat one, right Francis? You wouldn't lie to me." Arthur's bottom lip gave a quiver sealing the image. Francis took a look at the scones then back to Arthur.

"Mon lapin," he began.

"Please Francis." Arthur sniffled a little adding to the image. Francis made a pained sigh before looking into those emerald orbs again. Damn, Arthur had him eating out of his hand! That little conniving snake! Here I thought the British Empire had lost his touch and he was just hiding it!

Francis moved picking up one of the blackened bits before looking back at Arthur who had moved to giving him a hopeful puppy look. With another deep breath Francis took a bite of the thing Arthur had dumped on the cookie sheet. In a blur of motion Francis spat the bit into the sink before bolting out of Arthur's home, probably afraid of being yelled at or forced to eat more rock chunk.

"Hey look," Amelia's voice chirped, "dinner and a show." Arthur turned looking at her. She set a half-eaten pan of whatever Arthur had mixed together and half the rice on the counter. "Lunch was great." She smiled at him. "The show was rather impressive."

He smirked at the compliment.

The world began to blur and a whirling sound filled the room. We were all back in the conference room starring at the machine.

"Arthur can cook?" I said in shock only to realize everyone else had said a version of the same thing. We all looked at each other slightly horrified. We all nodded our heads in silent agreement to never speak of this moment again especially to poor Francis.


End file.
